I read this today and laughed out loud. It made me think of this discussion and I thought others might need a smile OR two!

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<snip> I relate well to the comment made by Barbara Johnson: "Patience is the ability to idle your motor when you feel like stripping your gears." I know that if I can keep the motor idling, it will be ready to go when I need it.

"A kindergarten teacher practiced keeping her motor idling. A story has it that she was helping one of her students put his snow boots on. He asked for help and she could see why. With her pulling and him pushing, they finally succeeded and she had by now worked up a sweat. She almost whimpered when the little boy said, "They're on the wrong feet."

"She looked and, sure enough, they were. It wasn't any easier pulling the boots off, and then she had to wrestle the stubborn boots on again.

"Just as she finished lacing them he announced, "These aren't my boots." She bit her tongue to keep from screaming, "Why didn't you say so?"

"Once again she struggled to pull off the ill-fitting boots. He then calmly added, "They're my brother's boots. My mom made me wear them." She began to realize how close she was to stripping her gears as she struggled with the boots yet again.

"When they were finally laced, she said, "Now, where are your mittens?"

"I stuffed them in the toes of my boots," he said."

Oh these are good! Thanks for sharing!

One of my friend's kids comments when seeing reindeer for the first time - "look mum, he's got ankles on his head!"

OMG Maryrin a virus that is a riot

My daughter took Rachel (age 6) and Drea (age 20 months) along to the doctor for Johann's 3-year check up. A young male physician's assistant they hadn't seen before checked Johann over, then asked for his permission to check the parts that were "inside his underwear." Johann agreed, and proudly announced, "Doctor - I have a penis!" Big sister piped up and said, "Yes, and I have a virus!" After the PA was able to control himself and stop chuckling, he gently explained her mistake.

Amoret wrote:
ROFL!!!!!
Lynn

From the mouths of babes.......

My daughter was a first grade teacher.

In preparation for a lesson that was to include frightening weather situations, she asked the class, "What is the scarriest thing you ever saw?"

A small boy at the back of the class raised his hand frantically to get her attention - and responded, "My dad's penis!"

How do you respond to THAT one?

this just reminds me of something that happened w/ my twins in Kindergarden, only it wasn't a child saying this:
Near the end of the year, Andrew was feeling ill so I went to get him. The nurse says: I notice you call him Andrew but I thought his name was Scott?

So I guess she thought that child was doubly clumsy or sickly as she saw him twice as often!

Florence, back after a busy busy June!

"Miss, I didn't mean to upset Tom. But he is sooooo stupid!"
"I'm not stupid. My Mum says my Dad is the really stupid one. You can check him out at parent evening."

From a piece of Science homework: "Velocity is when you do something really fast, like farting."

"Miss, can you help me?"
"Sure."
"My Mum is pregnant again. She'd be much happier if we could get rid of my 5 sisters and make sure this one is a boy."
(I'm good at my job, but I can't work miracles.)

12-year-old hands over a plastic bag. Inside three pairs of school trousers. I ask him:
"Sam, what do you want me to do with your school trousers?"
"I told my Mum that you sometimes help in Textiles and that you are real good. Mum thinks you should mend my trousers. They have all split down the middle."
Rather than sending the mother to parenting classes or sewing classes, I mended the trousers and sent them home with a note saying: "Mrs. ......., please, feel free to come into school any time and I'll show you how to mend Sam's trousers." Response from home: Nothing. Response from Sam: He keeps showing his bum to his friends with the comment: "Miss has mended them!"

And finally: In a history lesson after several weeks of covering World War II, a little girl whispers to me (it's well known in school that I'm German): "Miss, I'm so glad you survived!" Mmmhhh...... I was born in 1952 and don't normally look my age.

I was thinking about the posts with the lovely comments made by the innocence of children and was wondering if anyone else had some more.

I was in a First School as head secretary for eight years and wish I had kept a note of some of them, even the ones that came into the staff room from other members of staff. I advise anyone who works with children to do so. At the very least it will bring a smile to your face in the future or you could make a booklet of it and sell it at the school fête.

My favorite that comes to mind...

At lunchtime, after washing hands and picking up their lunch boxes, two little girls were skipping down the corridor, hand in hand back to class.

"I have a nice lunch today. I have an apple," said the first.

"Well I have a verruca!" said the second.